Marriage with meaning

Marriage with meaning

By Joe Renna

Marriage is an institution under which a man and a woman become legally united on a permanent basis. For most people it is also a religious rite. The spiritual and legal implications of the contract seem far more serious than the practice indicates. Society's casual attitude towards marriage is inconsistent with its treatment of other matters. There is more paper work involved in returning a gift at Macy's.

Cultural and religious tradition adds significant importance to a couple's actions. The more pre-marital counseling a couple receives the better the chances that they will be making an informed decision. The enlightenment doesn't only come from the church. In fact parents will have more to do with the couple's outlook on marriage than any other influence. That is why it is so important to communicate to our children. Through actions as well as words.

Catholics are required to go through Pre-Cana in preparation to marriage. The course covers issues the couples inevitably must face. For some couples it is a reinforcement of what was learned in the home, for others it is an important first step to understanding what marriage is all about. The emphasis is on communication, economics, family and sexuality. Not the more common of topics at the dinner table, but, they should be.

When spirituality is removed from the marriage equation then the essence of the institution is lost.

The statistic that half of all marriages end in divorce has almost reached cliche status. The stats are tainted by mixing all marriages together. Marriage has grown to mean different things to different people. There should be different services and different contracts to suit the couple's needs. The broad brush of the civil ceremony can't possibly paint the same meaning for every couple that takes the vows.

If it truly is a legal contract then treat it as such. It is only during divorce that couples become junior attorney's learning complex code to come out a winner. If half the energy spent on divorce was applied to the vows couples would be much better off.

The legal aspects of marriage are so far removed from the original meaning of the term that it should be time to create new institutions. Ones that will address common-law marriages, co-habitation relationships, marriage between homosexuals, and multiple marriages. If the government wants to dictate law over marriage it must be consistent.

Social ills stem from dysfunctional families. We could all use our experience and be a positive influence to our youth. Don't let them rely on the news and entertainment for their image of marriage. The institute of marriage is the cornerstone of a good community. We should work on cultivating healthy relationships. For our children's sake.

Not for Nothing But...
Some people ponder signing the terms of a car lease longer than they do contemplating marriage.